There's this new blog called crack elephants eating my chicken. It's basically all of my posts reposted in this...try hard language I can't really decipher. If you're reading this, I hope you know that Robert Chompsky is going after you right now. Right now I bought an IP address finder so I can backtrace his chicken so I can eat his laundry, thereby destroying him entirely. I hope all of my loyal followers help me get the ghetto capitalist revolution on this guys Vietnamese penis. I've about had it with all the people saying "OH EM GEE HE MUST BE THE REAL DEAL ROBERT, HE THINK'S YOUR STORY IS A JOKE!" Yeah well you can go fuck yourself unloyal subjects. Keff Joval is the biggest tryhard of them all. I'm going to find you gnome. This is what i'm going to do.
1. I'm going to buy 2 horses, and they will be exactly the same.
2. I will then take the horses to your daughers house, and hide one in the bush.
3. Afterwords I will bring the main horse into your house, and she will be thrilled there will be a horse in her house.
4. When you come out in shock and awe, I will stab you to death with Sharron, he owns a gun shop next to Chuck E. Cheese. He actually gets a shitload of buisness when it's near the spring hunting season. Now that I think of it, Sharron might be fucking my wife right now, but i'm so mad that I don't even care atm.
I think this gnome guy is just a text chat warrior, and he's a major threat because he may be behind this Kony Island thing going on now, with the invisible people and such. It's a conspiracy. I'll see to it that gnome get's his JUST DESSERTS. AND HE WILL SUFFER. I PROMISE THAT TO YOU ALL MY FANS. I LOVE YOU ALL. GOOD NIGHT.
I'm so disappointed in you, brother. You're supposed to make me say "My, what a lovely tea party!" at the end. JNCO capitalists everywhere are scratching their heads right now.
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